The answers

All right, I think I left two questions outstanding, correct? The first one being, what was I doing in that stadium? The other one Why was I studying and taking an exam? You got to forgive me for keeping (at least some of) you in agony, but I thoroughly enjoy this little bit of power I have over you from 10 000 km distance.

So on with the answers.

To the first one the answer is plain and simple: I attended the opening of the brand new stadium in Green Point, Cape Town. You must have seen pictures of it already for it is the most picturesquely located stadium they build for the coming World Cup. The stadium is a stone throw away from the ocean, it has a view on Table Mountain from within the stadium and there is a golf course lying right next to it.
The observant and loyal readers must have remarked that it is also located in the suburb where I live. Indeed it takes me about 15 minutes on foot from my front door to the entrance of the brand new stadium. And I intend to do that several times as I have tickets to all 7 world cup games which will be held here in Cape Town. Let me emphasize: I will be attending all World Cup games held in the Green Point stadium. That includes one 16^th final, one quarter final and one semi final, and I will only have to walk there 15 minutes. Now throw in the fact that I am not a football fan, and you must have an inkling of how jealous I am making my football loving friends at this moment.

Especially to those readers, I will sing: neh neh neneeh neeh, neh neh neneeh neh.(again, referring to the last sentence of my first paragraph)

So there I was at the opening of the Green Point stadium, attending the first ever football game held there. You know about the vuvuzelas so I won’t touch upon that again. Now try to imagine what kind of an event it would be if they open a new stadium in your home town. There would be some hustle and bustle, right? I am talking about brass bands, live performances, fire works, movie clips on the construction of the stadium, cheerleaders, sponsors left and right handing out free goodies, maybe even marines descending from the roof or fighter jets flying over in formation? None of that!! There was nothing! Ok, there was a band performing three songs and the dressed up a handful of girls like cheerleaders. And I saw two doll like figures bobbing around at the other side of the pitch, advertising something. But that was basically it. When the game started they counted down from 10 to 0, you know, for the official kick off of the first game ever! When they reached 0 they ball wasn’t even in the middle of the circle because the home team was still passing it around.

As feeble as the festivities were, so bad was the game. It was a premier league game, mind you. But the first real attempt came in the 88^th minute when a header accidentally ended up somewhere near the goal posts. The rest of the game was just an eyesore. Shame.

But I don’t wish to say negative things only. It is just easy to comment on what is bad, or what is lacking. I have to say the stadium itself is really beautiful to see. It is a very light structure and it allows you to reach the stands really easily. No crawling through dark catacombs, once you are in you walk right up to where you have to be. And there are plenty of stores to buy food or a beer. Very nice indeed.

Now on to the second question. What did I study, and what the flip was that exam about? I don’t think any one has guessed it. Although I must say that from the guesses you ventured, I got the impression I need to work on my image. No one said “lion tamer” or “snake expert” or any other cool and macho thing. One very good guess was “world cup host”. I might still want to try that. Escorting people to all 7 games in Cape Town, since I am attending them already. I told you that right? And about the finals?

I was studying and taking and exam to get my scuba diving certificate. That’s right. I am close to attaining my certificate for open water dives down to 18 metres. You have to take that stuff serious because if you mess up badly, you might end up killed. Yes sir, you can drown in 10cm of water. So if you go down to 18 metres you risk your life like 1800 cm/ 10cm = 180 times. And since I only have 1 life, that is quite significant I’d say. So that is why they make you take an exam. You have to study a book of roughly 540 pages. So with every 3 pages you learn, you eliminate 1 time you risk your life (on average).

On a serious note, the theory was quite extensive for a leisure activity, but it wasn’t that bad of course. I’m still proud to say I scored 49,5 / 50 #big smile.

(and now all you evil people are wondering what that one question was I got wrong).

I had the first dives as well. In a pool. To get to know how everything works, how to breathe, how to take off your goggles and put them back on, how to take off your tanks at put them

back on again, all that sort of stuff. Really cool, but not as cool as the first ocean dive I did. We went down to 6 metres to a little ship wreck lying there. Nothing too dramatic but I loved it! The plants, the fish, the starfish, the little octopus we saw. I thought it was incredible. It was also a lot more difficult then I thought. I was so tired after those two hours of diving, I had to take a nap before I could go and watch the 6 nations games (rugby).

I am certain I will do this a couple of times more often. I am already dreaming of diving to real ship wrecks. There are plenty of those along the coast and they organize dives to them.

Watch this space!

Hell's horns

The ancestor of the vuvuzela is said to be the kudu horn - ixilongoin isiXhosa, mhalamhala in Tshivenda - blown to summon African villagers to meetings. Later versions were made of tin.

The trumpet became so popular at football matches in the late 1990s that a company, Masincedane Sport (curses be upon them), was formed in 2001 to mass-produce it. Made of plastic, they come in a variety of colours - black or white for fans of Orlando Pirates, yellow for Kaizer Chiefs, and so on - with little drawings on the side warning against blowing in the ear!

There's uncertainty on the origin of the word "vuvuzela". Some say it comes from the isiZulu for - wait for it - "making noise". Others say it's from township slang related to the word "shower", because it "showers people with music" - or, more prosaically, looks a little like a shower head.

The announcement, on 15 May 2004, that South Africa would host the 2010 Fifa World Cup gave the vuvuzela a huge boost, to say the least - some 20 000 were sold on the day by enterprising street vendors.

It's a noisy thing, so there's no surprise some don't like it. Journalist Jon Qwelane once quipped that he had taken to watching football matches at home - with the volume turned low - because of what he described as "an instrument of hell".

http://www.southafrica.info/2010/vuvuzela.htm

Shark Chow

Mr Skinner, 37, a Zimbabwean who lived in the Democratic Republic of Congo, died in the way all Ocean enthusiasts dread. He got eaten by a shark. At 100m from the shore he was only chest deep. Many Capetonians frown when they hear he was 100m in because he should not be able to stand there they say.
But they had plenty of eye witnesses, including a man swimming close by. (moments after the event the first messages appeared on twitter giving an extra dimension to voyeurism). Not wanting to quote their simplistic reports, they say they saw the shark eat Mr Skinner in two times. Nothing remained but his swimming goggles and a cloud of blood. The shark supposedly was very big, "larger than a mini-bus". The last time a man got killed by a shark dates back to 2005 which can be seen as an indication of how rare this is. Moreover in 70% of the cases, the shark only bites a chunk at most and then runs off. Little consolation if you ask me. But in Fish Hoek they took some measures to counter this. They have guys monitoring the bay with binoculars. When sharks are spotted in the bay, a flag goes up to warn the people on the beach. This particular day there was a flag signaling that the waters were too murky to have clear sight for shark spotting. .